This essay is about two people who wanted to be kings. The first wanna-be ruler was John Lackland. He was king of England for seventeen years between 1199-1216. His major claim to fame was signing the Magna Carta at Runnymede in 1215. John wanted to put down an insurrection by forty English barons. The barons wanted equality under the law, different from what a king might have wanted. The Magna Carta was an earlier version of our Constitution.

King John Lackland

John Lackland was his full name. Lackland seems like a prophetic last name. John had lost English land in France due to his soft-sword. That term meant that he wasn’t militarily astute. He made deals with nearly everyone he met. The Magna Carta was his most significant deal, only to disavow it before the proverbial ink dried on his signature.

This is King John signing the Magna Carta.

John is the only British monarch with that name, which explains why British historians do not remember him fondly.

That is the backstory for this essay. King John Lackland was the first king that sat on a hollow throne. The other king that sits on a hollow throne is King Lackguts.

King Lackguts

King Lackguts, aka Speaker of the House of Representatives, is the other king that sits on a hollow throne. The similarities between the two kings are haunting. King Lackguts and King Lackland have the same political DNA. Lackguts signed his version of the Magna Carta. He could become the king if he gave up all his power to the MAGA Republicans like Rep. Lauren Boebert, Matt Gaetz, and Marjorie Taylor Greene. Anything that the MAGA Republicans want, King Lackguts will grant them. King Lackguts isn’t the ruler of the House unless the MAGAs concur. One member of the MAGA group could depose him.

King Lackguts has been told by his barons what he must get from Biden to pass raising the debt ceiling. King Lackguts, prior to his ascendency, voted for three increases in the debt ceiling with no strings in the last handful of years. But to remain the King of the House, he is forced to add cuts to Biden’s budget.

Let’s hear it for King Lackguts, “Hip, hip, hooray!”