The Benefit of Failed Dreams
The Dalai Lama’s Oxymoron

I have used this quote of Bobby Kennedy’s for years, “Some men see things as they are and say, why; I dream things that never were and say, why not.” That single sentence capsulated RFK’s modus operandi and the way he lived his life. He was a dreamer and a mentor of mine.


Some people who know me diss my drive to dream...especially me dreaming the seemingly impossible dreams. Of all my dreams in the past 74-years, I want to interview Daw Aung San Suu Kyi, the Lady. She is the most important leader of human rights in the world and has paid dearly for her dream to bring democracy to Burma.

The Lady

While that dream is paramount in my list, I have a long list of lesser ones. Nevertheless, all dreams are important to me. They motivate me to act, and I’ll never change my drive to dream. Having said that, I haven’t been successful in obtaining many of my dreams over my life. They have been dashed and lay on the side on my journey down my yellow brick road.

When I realize, at a professional or personal level, that a dream won’t be attainable, it results in a long litany of negative feelings: bitterness, disappointment, hurt, loss, and pain. Those feelings force me to address the Dalai Lama’s insight about dashed dreams. “Remember that sometimes not getting what you want is a wonderful stroke of luck.”

Dalai Lama

The Dalai Lama’s insight seems to be an oxymoron. Essentially, he is saying dashed dreams can be blessings. It is critically important for me to come to terms with this seeming contradiction. When dreams disappear, I feel dejected. However, strangely, after a month or year later, those failed dreams are a stroke of luck as the Dalai Lama contends. I could rattle off countless things about which I am delighted, as I look back, when some of my dreams were dashed.

It is also important to understand all dreams, realized and unrealized ones, are stepping stones to future dreams. Despite even dashed dreams, they will get you to a future dream.

As I write honestly about some of my dreams that didn’t come true, I wonder how Donald the Dumb feels about his seemingly impossible dream that did come true. Hmmm. There is an ever-increasing list of family members and others who are being looked into by a half dozen major investigators, which include the Special Council, FBI, and various House and Senate committees.

As Bobby Burns wrote, “The best-laid plans of mice and men often go awry.” Methinks that Donald the Dumb wishes Hilary Clinton was elected. Additionally, my guess is that Pence, Flynn, Sessions, Manafort, Kushner, Priebus, Page, Stone, Gordon, Nunes, and the list goes on and on wishing their dream didn’t come true either.

Bobby Kennedy

Bobby Kennedy

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Burma flag

Burmese independence flag

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Connecting The Dots

Connecting the Dots

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Donald the Dumb

Donald the Dumb

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Forrest Gump Film Poster

Forrest Gump, "Stupid is as stupid does."

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